Bassist Andrelton Simmons says depression and suicidal thoughts led to his decision not to participate during the final week of the Los Angeles Angels 2020 regular season, and told the Orange County Registry that “the idea to end the bubble season was too much for me to handle. “
Simmons, who recently ended a $ 10.5 million one-year contract with the Minnesota Twins, chose to share his story in writing, via a series of direct Twitter messages, instead of verbally, because “it’s still hard to articulate certain things or be open.”
The Angels announced Sept. 22 that Simmons had opted out of the last five games of the regular season. No additional information was provided, although Simmons said in a statement that he considered it “the best decision for me and my family.” At that time, the Angels remained mathematically in the race for second wildcard and second place in the AL West. While their chances of reaching the postseason were slim, league rules required potential playoff teams to start quarantining this week in preparation for the upcoming playoff games.
“It was hard for me mentally for the thought of suicide to cross my mind,” Simmons told the Registry. “It was something I promised a long time ago that I would never raise again. I was lucky enough to talk to a therapist, which helped me let go of those thoughts. In the end, when a lot of people were still going through what most would think in such difficult times, the idea of ending the season in a bubble was too much for me. “
Simmons played just 30 games during the abbreviated regular season, wasting time due to an ankle injury for the third straight summer. He told the Registry that it was difficult to focus on baseball when so many people were fighting in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic.
“The first time was to drive around Oakland and see some of the shops and restaurants trying to stay open with all the homeless people camping outside,” he said. “That’s when it really hit me.”
Simmons began communicating with a therapist, but his hesitations about getting into a playoff bubble persisted.
“I was very saddened by how I felt about the death toll and seeing how smaller companies stopped working and I felt a little depressed about how the effects of all the new rules and fears would affect people’s livelihoods and how they were becoming disconnected people, ”he said.
Simmons told the Registry that at the time he did not comment on the reasons why he chose not to participate “because I don’t like the idea of having to explain all the details of my life” and “I had fear of people judging and people twisting my story. ”But he said he changed his mind when he realized that being open about his situation could help other people struggling.
This report uses information from ESPN’s Alden González.