Not only that long-haul COVID-19 (now known clinically as post-acute sequelae of SARS-CoV-2, or PASC) Incredibly debilitating, experiencing a state of health that did not exist in the recent past can be quite isolating.
Living with COVID for a long time means that someone can feel good one day just for the sake of it symptoms to make them retreat in the following repository. People may also fear that friends, family, and co-workers may think so exaggerated – or have unrealistic expectations of their recovery.
As a friend, family member, or companion of someone experiencing postviral COVID-19, it’s important to offer support that doesn’t inadvertently minimize these symptoms and make people feel more alone in their struggle. According to experts, it is explained how to do it.
First, stop talking about the disease as something that will be resolved soon.
No one likes to see their loved one sick. However, if you want to relieve that pain, you can pressure the person to move forward when they are not ready, Jennifer Mann said: a psychotherapist and media advisor for Hope for Depression Research Foundation.
Asking “if they still feel better” can have a negative effect. “While the intention is kind, it may seem like impatience or an expectation that they would have already felt better,” which can lead to guilt or self-awareness, Mann said.
The same goes for telling them to “expect them to feel better soon” or to “rest a lot and come back soon,” he added. Lauren Selfridge, a psychotherapist who works with people with chronic illnesses.
We are still learning what happens over time with long-term COVID, so the persistence of symptoms will continue to be unpredictable. Because of this uncertainty, avoid slipping into the mindset of letting the person recover first and reconnect when they get better, Selfridge said.
“Maybe this isn’t just a period of‘ passing, ’but life is really happening,” so it’s important to keep getting closer to your loved one, ”she said.
Adjust your expectations for what your loved one may or may not do.
“Your friend or family member may not have the same level of energy or the same ability to appear,” Selfridge said. “And someone might have more energy than others a few days, but that doesn’t necessarily mean everything is ‘okay.'”
Nor does it mean seeing the person primarily through the lens of their illness, but seeing them as a versatile person going through challenges. They need you to change your expectations about how much they can give in the relationship, without defining their abilities or assuming what their energy levels are on a given day, Selfridge said.
Question they what they feel to do. Sometimes people don’t know how it will feel, said Lucinda Bateman, medical director of the Bateman Horne Center in Utah. They you may need to cancel or trim plans at the last minute. Prepare to be flexible and give them unbridled permission to do so.
Beware of toxic positivity.
Add yourself to telling the person that they could feel better if they adopt a more positive attitude, Selfridge said.
“The reality is that our bodies go through something,” he explained. “And as much as psychology can have a positive impact on the body, it does not necessarily completely eradicate a medical diagnosis. Therefore, it can be really offensive and very painful to suffer from a challenging illness and for someone to say that you should think differently ”.
Mann raised several phrases that people say may seem supportive, but may invalidate when someone is still dealing with the repercussions of COVID-19, including “you’re stronger than you think,” “I know you can do it,” and “you I’ll get it, be strong. “
Ask how they feel emotionally and be prepared for their true response.
Let your loved one with long-distance COVID know that you are available if you want to chat about how you feel about dealing with the problem. Make sure it’s when you have time to listen to them and let them share without interruption.
It is possible for someone to open up and share their emotional experience because you are more likely to understand those feelings, such as fear or anger, even if you do not have the illness yourself, Selfridge said.
You know that your loved one may change their mind about how they want to cope with their illness.
Someone may go through periods when they prefer not to pay attention or talk about how they feel, and periods when they want to talk about it, Selfridge said.
Saying something like, “I don’t know what to say or ask you, what would be a good way to talk to you about it? Do you want to talk about it?” Gives them permission to change their minds and shows their willingness to respect the way they have to deal with at that time.
Start the conversation and connect. Don’t wait to find out.
“Living in a struggling body means having less bandwidth, sometimes cognitive or emotional bandwidth, to be extroverted in our communication, ”Selfridge said.
They may not call or text as much as before, but don’t let that stop you from continuing to communicate with them. Continue to extend invitations for virtual hangouts (and when it’s safe to do so, recover in person) even if they decline.
Better yet, find creative ways to reach your loved one, even if they can’t join your social conversations, Selfridge suggested. They might like to receive a five-minute recording of the group of friends greeting or want to join the weekly Zoom call without their video being activated so they can go to bed.
Offer a hand with specific tasks, instead of wondering how you can help.
Ask someone to tell you how you can help “put pressure on the person so they have to come up with ways to be helpful, and then ask you to do these things, if they need your help,” Mann said. They may feel uncomfortable and worry about burdening others with requests.
Instead, create the action plan for them. Check to see if you’d like to bring dinner for a couple of nights or if they’re ready to schedule a quick call on Monday nights, so all they have to do is say yes or no.