After two weeks struggling to make fun of politics in Joe Biden’s time, Saturday night live he finally had something to work on this weekend: Donald Trump’s second indictment trial and the inevitable acquittal.
The scene opened Saturday with “Human White Claw” Tucker Carlson (played by Alex Moffat) hosting Kate McKinnon’s Lindsey Graham and Aidy Bryant’s Ted Cruz on his Fox News program.
“There’s a lot to cover tonight, including the dismissal,” Carlson said at the top of the cold open sketch. “So, instead of my usual monologue, here is a loose collection of awesome non-sequiturs. Is AOC hiding in your home right now? I wouldn’t get over it. Pronouns for dogs? Come on, everyone knows they’re guys. Pixar: Are you making our kids depressed or gay? Choose one! “
When Graham joined the show, he said, “Thank you, Tucker, it’s a great day for 30 percent of America,” before explaining, “We all agree that the attack on the Capitol went being a horrible thing. But just because the riots were called “fight for Trump” doesn’t mean they meant Donald Trump. They could have been real Tiffany bosses. Maybe some Eric stans? I don’t know! “
“But regardless, the trial is over and we can now get over it and focus on the serious issues,” he continued. “This blocks Hillary and frees the beautiful Britney Spears.”
“That’s a big point, Lindsey,” Carlson replied. “It really makes my face contort as if I’m thinking.”
Cruz then joined them as the words “Trump Said ‘Ugly Wife” appeared on the screen below him. “Like any impartial jury, we were tasked with meeting with defense attorneys to give them some very simple legal advice: stop and don’t.”
Then, after a handful of jokes at the expense of Trump’s defense attorneys, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (Beck Bennett) appeared to make a repeat of his sudden disapproval of the former president despite vote to acquit him.
“Everyone knows you can’t blame a former president,” McConnell said. “That’s why we should have accused him before, when I said we couldn’t.”
And finally, when asked what he really thinks of Trump, he added: “I think he is guilty. And the worst person I’ve ever met. And I hope all cities, counties, and states shut their asses. Oh God, I felt good! I’ve been holding this in my neck for four years! ”
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