I’ve always liked the feeling of a new beginning that always evokes the same word “January”. As the band Sleeping at Last says in their song “January White,” “Then let’s undo. / Rearrange the old and call it new – / January White.” my writing articles and setting calendars, schedules and workout plans, deciding who I want to be in this new year and how to reach that goal.
But this year I don’t feel that way. While I look forward to 2021 (and believe me, I’m looking forward to it!), I’m just lacking the enthusiasm to dust off my dreams, plans, and goals and start working once again. Part of that, no doubt, comes from a recently deepened awareness that things don’t always work out as planned. Maybe there’s a little frustration and anger at the monkey key he threw at the jobs, weddings, and future plans of so many of my friends. And part of me, I admit, is that I’m tired, tired of waiting for things to change, tired of fearing new complications, tired of the monumental effort this year has summoned us to.
When my favorite bullet newspaper YouTubers deployed the 2021 designs and planners started filling the stores, I realized I didn’t want to make New Year’s resolutions this year. Instead, I take a different approach to the New Year, which is no less control and hope.
Systems, not objectives
You’ve probably heard it said that systems are more effective than goals for a real lifestyle change. It is true that many New Year’s resolutions resemble habits, which can be part of systems. But building a successful system means being willing to review it and change it often, constantly asking yourself, “Does this work for me?” and, “Am I still chasing something I think is good?” instead of sticking to the rule you chose on January 1st.
The principle that “systems are more effective than goals” may seem a bit clinical to get away from New Year’s resolutions, but this year I think it’s a good mentality to think more in terms of life we want to live right now as opposed to the life we want in the future or the goal we pursue. For example, instead of lighting a dime on January 1 to review my entire work schedule and sleep, I started waking up early about two weeks ago and let my instincts help me. to build an effective daily routine for what I am now working on. Everything is flexible (the projects I have right now, the hobbies I enjoy, and even the daily hours of sunlight) influence the look of my current schedule, so I’m more optimistic about wearing the method, though not this precise framework, until 2021 and letting me go with the flow as things change.
Also, this method means not driving a wedge between “the person I am now” and “the person I want to convert”. Approaching each day with a flexible system and the intention to spend this day as well as I can means not thinking in terms of black and white, “before and after”.
I hope it’s not a list of deposits
I think what I’ve always liked about the start of a new year is the underlying feeling of hope: that this year will be better than last year, that there are new things on the horizon, that anything can happen. what. This year, I leave that hope in the forefront, because I think it’s more important than the resolutions.
At best, dreams, goals, and plans are an embodiment of hope. But in the worst case, they are an illusion of control. At times, I approach a new phase of life determined to make it work, setting unrealistic expectations and pushing myself incredibly make things happen. If 2021 didn’t teach us anything else, it taught us that sometimes we have no control.
But that doesn’t mean we can’t have hope. While I wait for 2021, I try to think in terms of hopes instead of plans. The things I love most about the new year are not things I can control: they are huge things, like the end of the global pandemic, peace in my country, and happiness for my family and friends. Like all the most important things and all the ones we desire most deeply, I can’t make these things happen, no matter how good my intentions are. That was always true, but this year in particular has made it very clear.
Of course, you can adopt resolutions for 2021 and still have hope, but I found it helpful to drop huge, general goals for a while. That way, I can lean into the experience of letting things come as they can, while I’m prepared to comply with the systems I put in place in my life. I can’t control it next year, but I can give myself space to meet him with hope and courage.