Get out of the deep end soaked in paranoia and lose your mind
Look, the truth is this: you can do all this and still have your privacy and your data completely destroyed. Hackers can still access it. Whatever Western government you live in, you can probably still be guided with Sauron-level surveillance. The social networking company that holds your data can misconfigure your databases and expose your email address and phone number. It’s actually a wash.
However, if you really want to be completely safe and make sure your personal information is protected, I’ve thought about it and there are a couple of additional steps you can take. Here they are:
– Drink strongly and ruminated on the madness of the modern world.
– After a night or three at night, go to the nearest window and throw away your stupid computer while shouting “I’M NAILED” like Peter Finch in Net.
– Climb things and kill your phone. Desolder the fucker, crush it to pieces with a ball hammer, and then burn the parts in a ritualistic conflagration in the back garden. Later, siphon the ashes from your phone into a small glass vial and hang them around your neck to remind you of your triumph over evil.
– Cancel your lease, sell your earthly possessions and drive. On? Do not care. Just get out of there.
– Living in a tent in unincorporated territory and reading books and swimming in the river. Learn to enjoy simple things like the sound of crickets at night, the majestic view of a dollar crossing the prairie, and your body odor.
– We pray that one day, in some unseen American future, your congressional leaders will grow real and real testicles and introduce laws to regulate the dystopian corporate monsters that have swallowed the world and eradicated human privacy.
– Crying for humanity.